Sports writer Tim Dahlberg made an interesting comment about Tiger Woods when he recently blew a golf tournament at Pebble Beach. Woods, down only two shots going into the final day, clutched and lost the match by nine. Only four of the 68 players were worse than Tiger that day. Dahlberg observed, He seemed to be trying so hard not to fail that he gave himself no chance to succeed.
Does that ever happen to us? Of course; it happens to everyone. It seems odd, but we sometimes try so hard to be perfect that we actually get in our own way, generating fatigue and greatly reducing effectiveness. Despite what the early Puritans may have told us, there are occasions when a more casual attitude does work better.
Once, during a company reorganization, I found to my dismay that I was unexpectedly downgraded in order to make room for a higher-level executive who had been demoted. I was not happy about the new position, so I started looking for another job. But then one day I realized that I had more time to spend with a growing family, that I had a chance to be outside in some great summer weather, that I didnt have to supervise anyone, and that business life suddenly seemed a lot less stressful. So I began treating the new job more like an enjoyable diversion.
Nothing really bothered me because I felt that I wouldnt be working for that company much longer anyway. Strangely, that pleasant summer turned out to be one of the most productive periods of my business career. Even more strangely, my old supervisory position was restored in the fall amid glowing management comments about how well I had performed under those difficult circumstances. The reality of it was that I didnt really give a darn how I performed, so naturally everything came much easier.
It doesnt hurt to relax a little, as long as you dont allow yourself to come completely unglued. You can make yourself look foolish by trying too hard, and the image of a tightly wound overachiever is not appealing.
If you are making an important business presentation, relax a little. The world will not come to an end if you mess up some small detail. Loosen up; your audience will appreciate it. If you are selling a proposal to top executives, dont be so serious that your demeanor begins to worry them. They will then focus on your manner of presentation, and not on your idea.
If you are giving a TV interview, relax and smile. Those cameras cant hurt you, but your viewers will if you cant come across as a likable person. If you are overly concerned about a personal relationship, relax. Your real personality will shine through more easily, and you will seem a lot more attractive.
No matter what you do, the sun will rise in the east tomorrow, the day will be wonderful, and you will have another chance, once again, to prove yourself.